in case you’re wondering why everyone is lonely
I used to wonder at the way
a crowd
could feel lonely
feeling reality
without explanation
some say it’s a matter of
technology, this recent
digital life, before that
the industrial revolution, maybe
Rome’s roads drove us apart
some say it’s a matter of
words, possibility against
a lack of truth, define
for yourself what means anything
or nothing to anyone
some say it’s a matter of
perspective, who really knows
the life you’ve lived inside
looking in through the window
of their own experience
some say it’s a matter of
physics, that matter
never touches, have you ever
really touched another object
much less a person
some say it’s a matter of
sin, of protective clothing
hiding the truth, shameful
parts too much to bear
before God and man
now I wonder how this crowd
of disciplines can explain the reality
of aloneness so impartially
while the poets just bleed
words that never mean the same thing twice
II.
in case you’re wondering what more there is to say
into a tangle of theories
enters Immanuel, born and bearing
no explanation but experience
fully committed, a Child
like and unlike any other
bypassing the efforts of man
this Word, true beyond words
sees with human-eyed divinity
his touch makes first contact, sending
a thrill through the innermost parts of humankind
the wonder of it all, how
crowds of us lack
hope in the face of God-With-Us
the reality is we have never been
alone
III.
in case you’re wondering whether God gets lonely
you may well wonder
given all the crowded reality of the
Trinity, could someone explain how
God
knows what to do with our loneliness
some said it’s a matter of
fact that God would never do
such a blasphemous thing as being
born – but I’m not sure
the Lord got the message
some said it’s a matter of
pride that Messiah stay in his lane
the mess of making peace is
beneath his dignity – not the throne He
chose for his glory
some said it’s a matter of
flesh and spirit, the two
simply don’t mix, one
must leave behind one
or the other – yet Jesus claims both
some said it’s a matter of
justice, that God is just
for us – the mystery is why
the Christ also appears to those
at the top of the heap
some said it’s a matter of
tradition, find the oldest and
it will be best – no matter what
God has been up to
in the meantime
meanwhile, God lies in the manger as
crowds wonder and fail to
explain his experience, his reality
he who was, is, will be – this Child waits
alone
Writing this poem became a conversation with God. It began as a simple lament about loneliness, but I sensed that God had more to speak into that experience, so I kept writing to see what would happen. An invitation emerged: to be present with the Christ Child in this season of Advent.
This poem is made of two kinds of five-line stanzas. I borrowed five key words from the very first stanza (wonder, crowds, explanation, reality, and alone) to create a pattern for one type. These stanzas mix the repeating words, considering the emotional experience of loneliness from different angles as the poem moves along.
The second type of stanza appears in two groups of five that all share a common first line. These express different intellectual efforts to address the issues at hand, first the question of loneliness and then the mystery of the incarnation. As I wrote, these groups became a picture of both a desire to understand and the limits of human explanation.
The middle section of this poem doesn’t follow the rules. Christ will not conform to any of the explanations offered, transcending our efforts to understand even our own loneliness by living our experience. God is no longer looking down on our condition, he has lived it and he uniquely understands. Jesus holds the experience of God and of humankind together in one body.
“Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took on the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being.” (Phil 2:6-7)
This is a mystery that we can examine, but never fully grasp. The last section of the poem begins by asking whether God really understands us but continues by demonstrating how we fall short of understanding God.
God’s choice to enter our experience and bring salvation through Jesus is a profound mystery that the church has turned over in her mind for centuries. We celebrate the same holidays year after year because this rhythm of experience deepens our faith when our understanding falls short.
Our place on the night of Christ’s birth is kneeling beside the manger, our gaze on a mystery that Holy Spirit must help us embrace. Yet so often, we leave Christ lying in his manger alone while we go about our busy Christmas season. Advent invites us to be still amid our questions and longings and experience the reality of God’s presence with us.
©2024 Jacqueline Tisthammer. All rights reserved.
Photo by Greyson Joralemon on Unsplash
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